The Lawyer and the Redneck!

The Lawyer and the Redneck!!!!!!!!

A lawyer and a redneck are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that rednecks are so dumb that he could get one over on them easy. So the lawyer asks if the redneck would like to play a fun game. The redneck is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks.

The lawyer persists, "This game is a lot of fun. I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5. You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."

This catches the rednecks attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, agrees to play the game.

The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The redneck doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.

Now, it's the rednecks turn. He asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?"

The lawyer uses his laptop, searches all references. He uses the air phone, he searches the Net and even the Library of Congress. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After an hour of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the redneck and hands him $500. The redneck pockets the $500 and goes right back to sleep.

The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes up the redneck and asks, "Well, what does go up a hill with three legs and come down with four?" The redneck reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.

Hilarious! I’m still laughing! grinz.  Hugggggggglez and God Bless!

“To announce that there must be no criticism of the president, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.”  Theodore Roosevelt, World War II

I think these words are more prevalent today than at any other time in our history!  Take heed, Barry Soetoro does not allow criticism of himself or his wife.. why not?  Why won’t he show us a valid birth certificate proving he was born in America?  Why won’t he show us legal documentation showing that he legally changed his name from Barry Soetoro to Barrack Hussein Obama??  He’s an attorney after all, what name did he get his degree and license under eh? Why won’t he show the America public??  I’ll tell you.. because he is a FRAUD!!

Make sure to mail ur tea bags on April 1^st!!!  You’d be amazed at how many across the country have their letters ready to mail.. and at how many Americans have already had “tea-party’s”!!!  Let’s do what we can to get that fraud out of the White House, and to stop his outrageous taxing of the public!!!  He’s a liar and fraud, and we need to get rid of him A.S.A.P.!!

Thank you and God Bless.

New Discovery!!

  The Heaviest Element
*/Lawrence Livermore Laboratories/* has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, *Governmentium *(symbol=Gv), has one *neutron*, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called *morons*, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called *peons*. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a *reorganization* in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming *ISO dopes*.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as *critical morass*. When catalyze with money, Governmentium becomes *Administratium* (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

Boston Tea Party - 21st Century style!!

Tea Bags

I will be sending in the tea bag, I hope you will too.

There's a storm a brewing'. What happens when good, responsible people keep quiet? Washington has forgotten they work for us. We don't work for them. Throwing good money after bad is NOT the answer. I am sick of the midnight, closed door sessions to come up with a plan. I am sick of Congress raking CEO's over the coals while they, themselves, have defaulted on their taxes. I am sick of the bail-ed out companies having lavish vacations and retreats on my dollar. I am sick of being told it is MY responsibility to rescue people that, knowingly, bought more house than they could afford. I am sick of being made to feel it is my patriotic duty to pay MORE taxes. I, like all of you, am a responsible citizen. I pay my taxes. I live on a budget and I don't ask someone else to carry the burden for poor decisions I may make. I have email-ed my congressmen and senators asking them to NOT vote for the stimulus package as it was written without reading it first. No one listened. They voted for it, Pork and all.

O. K. Folks, here it is. You may think you are just one voice and what you think won't make a difference. Well, yes it will and YES, WE CAN!! If you are disgusted and angry with the way Washington is handling our taxes. If you are fearful of the fallout from the wreck less spending of BILLIONS to bail out and "stimulate" without accountability and responsibility then we need to become ONE, LOUD VOICE THAT CAN BE HEARD FROM EVERY CITY, TOWN, SUBURB AND HOME IN AMERICA. There is a growing protest to demand that Congress, the President and his cabinet LISTEN to us, the American Citizens. What is being done in Washington is NOT the way to handle the economic free fall.

So, here's the plan.

April 1, 2009 all Americans are asked to send a TEA-BAG to Washington, D. C. You do not have to enclose a note or any other information unless you so desire. Just a TEA-BAG. Many cities are organizing protests. If you simply search, "New American Tea Party", several sites will come up.  If you aren't the 'protester' type, simply make your one voice heard with a TEA-BAG. Your one voice will become a roar when joined with millions of others that feel the same way. Yes, something needs to be done but the lack of confidence as shown by the steady decline in the stock market speaks volumes. This was not my idea. I visited the sites of the 'New American Tea party and an online survey showed over 90% of thousands said they would send the Tea-bag on April 1.  Why, April 1?? We want them to reach Washington by April 15th.  Will you do it? I am certainly going to!!  And I'm not putting the fraud’s fake name either, I'm using his legal name which he never legally changed to BHO!

Send it to:

Mr. Barry Soetoro; posing as: Barack Obama
c/oThe White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Washington, D. C. 20500.

Forward this to everyone in your address book. Visit the web site below for more information about the 'New American Tea Party'. I would encourage everyone to go ahead and get the envelope ready to mail, then just drop it in the mail April 1. Can't guarantee what the postage will be by then, it is going up as we speak, but have your envelope ready. What will this cost you? A little time and a 40 something cent stamp.

(Buy a "forever" stamp now and you won't have to worry about the price of the stamp) What could you receive in benefits? Maybe, just maybe, our elected officials will start to listen to the people. Take out the Pork. Tell us how the money is being spent. We want transparency and accountability!!  Remember, the money will be spent over the next 4-5 years. It is not too Late.

You can count on it, I will send a tea bag !!!

 

The letter everyone wants to write!

"Dear IRS, I'm sorry to inform you that I'm not going to be able to pay the taxes owed on April 15th, but all is not lost. I paid these taxes, accounts receivable tax, building permit tax, CDL tax, corporate income tax, dog license tax, federal income tax, unemployment tax, gas tax, hunting license tax, fishing license tax, waterfowl stamp tax, inheritance tax, inventory tax, liquor tax, luxury tax, Medicare tax, city tax, school and county property tax up to 33% the last four years. Real estate tax, Social Security tax, road use tax, toll road tax, state and city sales tax, recreational vehicle tax, sales franchise tax, state unemployment tax, federal excise tax, telephone tax, telephone federal state and local surcharge tax, telephone minimum usage surcharge tax, telephone state and local tax, utility tax, vehicle tax, registration tax, capital gains tax, lease severance tax, oil and gas assessment tax, Colorado property tax, Texas, Colorado, Wyoming, Oklahoma, Mexico sales tax and many more I can't recall and I've run out of space and money. When you do not receive my check April 15th, just know that it was an honest mistake. Please treat me the same as the way you've treated Congressman Charlie Rangel, Chris Dodd, Barney Frank, ex-congressman Tom Daschle and, of course, your boss, Timothy Geitner. No penalties, no interest. PS, I'll make at least a partial payment as soon as I get my stimulus check.

 Ed Barnett, Wichita Falls.

 

This was a real letter, and Mr Barnett was on Glenn Beck’s show that day.  I watched it.  He does have his taxes ready to pay, but of course, he’s gonna wait till midnite on the 15^th to pay em.

I WANT A DIVORCE!

Subject: Divorce agreement

Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressive-s, socialists, Marxist s and Obama supporters, et al:

We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce.

I know we tolerated each other, for many years for the sake of future generations. But sadly, this relationship has run its course.

Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is a model separation agreement:

Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion.

That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement.. After that, it should be relatively easy!

Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them..

You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military.

You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).

We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street.

You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens.

We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks.

We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.

You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.

You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security..

We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values..

You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U. N.. but we will no longer be paying the bill.

We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars.

You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find.

You can give everyone health care ... IF ... you can find any practicing doctors.

We'll continue to believe health care is a luxury and not a right. We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem.

I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.

We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot.

Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag.

Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots.

In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you ANWAR ... which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.

Sincerely,

John J. Wall

Law Student and an American

P. S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda with you.

well folks, how’s it goin for ya?  ain’t obama a hoot? LOL moron !  dammed commie pinko pigface socialist asshole!  we’ve got to git his ass outa the white house soon and reverse all the damage he’s done so far.  amazing how he has screwed things up so fast ain’t it!  Let’s just hope and pray that Atty Berg can get the Supreme Court to finally listen to him!!  I'm going to be so glad when that fraudulent commie asshole is out of my White House!!  I was so tickled Thursday nite on the Stephen Colbert show.. The Colbert Report.. that he mentioned to his guest that Obama had never shown anyone a valid birth certificate and that rumor has it that he was born in Kenya with gramma watching!  the guest, forget his name, wouldn’t answer Stephen and changed the subject.. very quickly!! Stephen tried to get an answer from him but ran out of time and just cut him off.  At least someone finally said it out loud what millions of us know.. Obama is a fraud and needs to get out of the White House before he’s lynched, impeached, or worse!!!!!!! When those moronic socialist 51% that voted him into office realize what he’s done.. Armageddon will seem like a church picnic.  He’d better run hard and fast back to Africa (where he came from!!) when the population finds out how he hoodwinked em all.  People are basically stupid, but when u constantly lie to them and then they realize just how big a lie u’ve been living and telling.. all Hell IS gonna break loose my friends!  Cover ur asses and pray to God daily that the demi-god is removed from this country soon!! love to all, Rosie.

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DONATE TO THE CAUSE IF U CAN.. EVEN A DOLLAR WOULD HELP! http://obamacrimes.com

and if u want, please send a THANK U note to Mr. Keyes. Am so glad someone with balls if talking to the press and getting the press to release their interviews!! :)

FINALLY, someone recorded Sen Keyes on what he really thinks about Nobama!! he also knows that nobama is NOT qualified to be president!!!!!!!!

LOL, this is so dang funny, u gotta watch this!  i think i’d seen it before a couple years ago, so maybe this has been dug out of the archives and reposted.  The dog is still the smartest human around! grin.

Please continue to visit Obamacrimes.com and let’s get that fake out of the white house!!!!!!!!!!!  it’s time to take some real action people!!